Monday, December 26

There seems to be some sort of cap trend going around

We counted a whole 210 of them at Knox today. We may have double counted some...still. That's a lot of caps. And then for added excitement, some of these cap wearers had hoods on top as well! Imagine that!

Off to Lake Eildon tomorrow. Shall be fun.

Wednesday, December 21

Something suitable. My blogging skillz have gone down. I no longer have the energy to think of titles.

I guess this is just an end of high school, where to now, Christmas, New Year's and end of year post. Though the excitement from reading this particular post comes from the unknown. Which topic shall I cover first?! Oh, the excitement!

End of high school life wise, I'm sorta meh. It comes and goes. I'm melancholy when I realise that I will never get to do all that stuff again, and never be able to have the experiences which I did ever again. At the same time though, it's sort of nice to move on, and to be doing something new. Though it will probably be rather uncomfortable for a little while. I remember moving schools in year was really awkward all the time. I had no friends. It was very upsetting.

Then there's the whole having to be an adult or "encountering the real world" which, as we have been informed by many people, is not as nice as high school world. I'm sure it's nice enough...


I'm not particularly articulate of late. I should fix that. Somehow.

Articulate, leads my thoughts to words, leads my thoughts to getting around to writing that book, leads my thoughts to that massive list of stuff I had written down. That list of stuff regarding what to do post exams. I don't think any of that has happened yet...however, I do have a new list of stuff to do.

1. Make some sort of diary for next year (semi-important, sort of priority...not really actually)
2. Make a bunch of gift cards and sell them and make squillions of dollars before I've even turned 18.

I need to buy paper first though. And clean up the house and table and stuff. There's all this junk on my table...yeah, once I start making things, organisation is not a priority.

So yeah, selling cards would be nice. Making money, and gaining work experience. That's the where to now part I guess. Plan next year is to get mega involved, have crazy grades, and get a part time job. Yep. That's all there is to it. Apparently I should start debating. That would probably be a good idea. Although debating does scare the hell out of me. As in, strikes fear into my heart. Speaking, I don't mind. I quite like speaking, when I'm prepared. But giving an argument, actually it's more the thinking on the spot business, I'm not too great at. Shall see. I should probably start working harder from here on in. My study regime this year was rather slack...I worked. But probably not enough.

I wish someone would give me money to study. That would also be nice.

I also want a job. Because I have two months to do stuff.

I also need to practise piano.

My tummy hurts. Things to do, places to clean. Fare well.

Almost forgot this.
Who can say if I've been changed for the better? I do believe I have been changed for the better. And because I knew you, I have been changed for good.
I like it. It's very apt. Because I have no idea who I would have been had I stayed at Vermont, what I would like, what I might have been good at or what opportunities and experiences I might have had that I don't have in this life. But I do think that I took the better path, and that I have been changed for the better in doing so. Sure, there was sadness and stress and teenage angst and mistakes and stuff, but that would have happened anyway. I think.


Monday, December 12

I woke at 4am and can't sleep

So naturally I'm blogging on my phone. Don't know if I woke cause I'm excited or cause my arms be mega itches. Might be both. I'm rather sleepy. My alarm is set to go in another two hours. Should try sleep.

Picnic was immense fun though. It
didn't rain. Happy birthday little one.

So I should try get back to sleep. But my arms have so much itch. And my knees hurt cause I woke up so early. In tossing up between itchy arms and possibly getting grass stains on my new cardi, I chose the itches. Hrm.

But twas immense immense fun with awesome people. Now I'm gonna go sleep.

Thursday, December 8

Sometimes I do stupid things

Such as actually believing that tumblr was giving away iMacs. Sigh. Now creepy men will turn up at my house, call my home phone, and spam my email. Or give me some sort of virus, apparently. Which is why I'm still up. I would have gone to bed, but I am currently running a virus is at 67%. Hopefully my computer doesn't die. Though I do need to fix several problems, such as speakers being weird, monitor refusing to turn off, and somehow finding that illusive/ellusive/unfindable cable which allows me to have a webcam. I'm really sleepy. My eyes refuse to concentrate on anything in particular. It's freakin 1am. Interview on Friday. Inverloch on Monday. Results next Friday. And my brain is doing some sort of weird brain implosion, whose reality inception dance inside my head. Staying up late does weird things to my mind.

Still at 67%. This is gonna take a while. I guess I could just tell it to shut down after it's done. There's an idea. But I don't know if it's going to kill the bad things once it finds them...I'll see how far it's gotten after I write down this partial scene.

Apparently there was nothing on my computer...I don't trust my AVG scanning.

Sunday, December 4

Cleaning my room yields many interesting things

Such as this:

Remember the love we promised in the fall? That I left on a shelf next to a porcelain doll. Which one day I would brush, and as it shattered around me. Lying there, dusty fragments that I never did see.

It was meant to be a song...I still remember the melody. But in hindsight, it sucks and lacks subtlety. I prefer Bon Iver myself.


No, I can't hear what he's singing. But whatever it is, it's frickin depressing.


And, for a further ten minutes, happy birthday Jay-Z.

1:26am the next day

Yay for funny people.


Saturday, December 3

Going On

Something I wrote in year nine for our poetry unit, and in my current mood, there are parts of it which still remain relevant. Cleaning my room is a very nostalgic venture. The rhyming thing is a little annoying, but that was the structure of the poem.

I look back, no longer do I belong,
And here I stand. Where I want to be.
I long for the past, but I'm going on

Clear droplets falling, and I'll be gone.
Standing there in silence, they're watching me.
I look back, no longer do I belong.

Moving from these walls. They are all I've known
For two warm years, where I was happy.
I long for the past but I'm going on.

We warmly embraced, such a mournful song.
Lost in a deep pool of cold misery.
I look back, no longer do I belong.

Recall her face, when I said I'd be gone.
Tears streaming. Hit hard, and swore at me.
I long for the past, but I'm going on.

Deep she hid her sorrow, and she had conned
All those around, sadness they did not see.
I look back, no longer do I belong.

A year from then, now singing this song.
It will be better, they're still here with me.
I look back. No longer do I belong.
I long for the past, but now I've gone on.