This is going to be the last post of the year. How exciting. Somehow it's a little commemorative. So what have I learnt this year?
I think I've learnt the meaning of fear. That gut-wrenching feeling of numbness when I realised that someone close to me wasn't as indestructable as I had always thought. Which gave me a lot of time to ponder death, which I have come to realise is quite a frightening thing, in that it's not just the stopping of someone's heart or breathing, but the end of hopes, dreams, and everything that defined that person. So I've also learnt that I should live life. Really live it, and though the physical evidence may suggest otherwise (i.e. sitting and vegetating in front of the computer as my Restaurant City employees work), one of my New Year's resolutions will be to attempt to make a resolution of working harder. Yes attempt. Maybe I should change that to motivate myself more. I was never very good at setting goals.
But I will try.
The strange thing is that I've been told I'm pessimistic. But this comes from someone who used to like Fall Out Boy, currently likes Black Eyed Peas, and has informed me that life will be over when we leave uni, so I'm not too worried.
They say teens these days get into a lot of trouble because we feel invincible. I do feel invincible, but not in a reckless, bodily-harming way. At the moment, I'm just feeling extremely content and peaceful, and as though nothing can stop me.
The coming of VCE worries me, but only a little. I've been told that the ENTER is only a number. All I can say to that is that everything in life is only a number, that the year 2009 is only a number, that 2010 will only be a number. But it means something. It symbolises something. Otherwise we'll all just wander through life with no goals, no dreams to fulfill, nothing to live for.
So I'm going to try make 2010 the best year of my life, and make it my life goal for each year to be better than the last.
Bring on 2010.