If

I have been less active with this blog. Which is good from the Sarah-attempting-not-to-time-waste point-of-view (you like them hyphens?). There's actually been quite a bit which I've wanted to say, but mega lethargy has been settling in.

If I'm to fall, would you be there to applaud, or would you hide behind them all? Cause if I have to go, then in my heart you'd grow, and that's where you belong.

In awesome news, Nadal won the US Open. In all honesty, I didn't expect him to when the Open started nary three or so weeks ago, but he did it. Second youngest man to achieve The Grand Slam (with capitals), and youngest in the Open Era. Has also won gold at Olympics, although tennis wasn't a sport at the Olympics for about seventy years. But still awesome. His humility never ceases to amaze me. His "sportivity" as he dubbed it about six years ago, when he was only a year or so older than I am now, and he won his first grand slam. I'll stop singing his praises now and move on. But well done.

I am also filled with a sudden longing to meet him. And a longing to see U2 and the MSO play Disney. Why? Because my brother's going to the U2 gig, and the rest of my family's going to MSO, but I'm not. However, I am going to France, so there's a very good reason for it. Jealous, but I'm lucky to be going, so not fussed.

If you won't save me, please don't waste my time

My phone has decided that it no longer wishes to conform with societal norms and function as a normal phone. Therefore, I am using my brother's old Sony Ericsson, which constantly freezes. As in, I am sitting on the train, and I will feel a buzz in my pocket. Expecting a message, I open it up, yet lo and behold, I see a blank screen with the buttons lit up. The phone then resets itself due to "Inactive SIM" (when the SIM is clearly very active), and applies the "YES OPTUS" theme, which is not only ugly, but completely irrelevant seeing as I'm not even with Optus, and it's only set on default cause my brother was with Optus. I need a new phone. Hurry up and expire, oh phone plan mine.

We come again to this time of the year, when we are massively rehearsing for Speech Night, and we walk around the sitting singing songs (badly) and trying to harmonise. I say trying because my ear is terrible, and I end up abandoning the harmo line anyway for the line which is easiest to hear, and therefore sing.

It's strange how much the music department has become such a big part of my life. I'll really miss it when I leave Macrob. That amazing feeling of being part of something, the going up and playing at lunchtimes, the vibe of it all. I really will miss it. I've met some amazing people through the music program, some of whom will be leaving this year, and I've had the fortune to know and learn under some amazing teachers. I'll really miss it all. And I will miss you year 12s. And no Lydia, I'm not about to cry.

...if I got it wrong? And no poem or song could put right what I got wrong. Or make you feel I belong. What if you should decide, that you don't want me there by your side? That you don't want me there in your life?

I also wish to play Lord of the Rings for Speech Night next year; a nice arrangement, with all the soundtracks. But I don't know how we're going to make that happen...I've been listening to The Breaking of the Fellowship over and over. It's beautiful.

To all those who are going to formal, I hope you have a wonderful night, full of magic and splendour.

When the cold of winter comes, starless night will cover day. In the veiling of the sun we will walk in bitter rain. But in dreams, but in dreams. I can hear your name. And in dreams, and in dreams. We will meet again. When the seas and mountains fall, and we come to end of days; from the dark I hear your call. Calling me there. I will go there, and back again.