Don't you wish it'd go on forever

The final night was amazing. It was the best feeling in the world. That moment when the audience is cheering, and you haven't even played perfectly, but you've done what you set out to do. That absolutely incredible feeling of performing. It's indescribable. That moment, when we stood up after that extremely long last chord which we didn't want to let go of, with the excitement and pure joy bubbling inside my chest. I was unbearably happy. It's actually a strangely painful emotion. Probably not because of the happiness, actually, but knowing that it was the last time that we would be able to do that as that particular group. 

The audience helped a lot. It was more the fact that they clapped so hard for the show, and the fact that it was the final night, rather than any crazy prowess on my part that made me feel so good. 

I can't put it into words, no matter how hard I try. I just keep replaying it over and over in my head. That huge last chord which we milked for all it was worth. The encore, the first night we got an encore. The first time we ever played the outmarch. Because we just didn't want it to stop. Well, at least, I didn't. 

My first and last high school musical (ha) was amazing. Despite me having been in a terrible mood during rehearsals, the performances were fantastic. I was on such a high for the last two weeks, just to see it all coming together. 

Having that final night also made my mind fast-forward, to about seven months from now when I will sit in the hall for the last time. The thought of having to say goodbye. 

I'm very grateful for the fact that I've discovered music. That I've had the chance to be part of ensemble playing. There is nothing better in the world than to be able to share the joy success with other people. Solo playing, well, like the name suggests, it's more for myself. I do it more for relaxation than for anything else. But performing with others is actually to create, lame as though that might sound. 

I have no idea what I'm trying to say anymore, and with each word this gets more confusing. So I'll stop. 

Just know that it was incredible. And I can't stop smiling. 

Now, back to studying for the many SACs which I have. My school work has been neglected during the past two weeks. Sigh.